Fashion Statement

�The red spots are absolutely lovely. They match your dress perfectly. Where�d you get them? I saw an ad from Mayo offering something similar. Is that where you found them?�

�Not Mayo. Kaiser-Permanente--they have the most refined choices. Nothing vulgar or too obvious.�

�Speaking of obvious--and vulgar--don�t look now, but Michelle just came in wearing the most hideous, blotchy mess. It�s as though someone splattered paint all over her, and not in a tasteful, Jackson Pollock sort of way, either. I bet it�s some kind of cheap rosacea--no one seems to be able to produce a good, well-formed variety, but they do keep trying. And if they set the price low enough, it seems they can always find somebody to buy it.�

�I�d never do rosacea--it simply has no symptoms to speak of. I want an experience, something I can really feel. Sometimes, when life just gets me down, a good fever with chills is the only thing that can snap me out of it.�

�Oh, yes. I know exactly what you mean. I simply cannot understand those people who insist on maintaining nothing but robust good health all the time. It must get so boring. Didn�t Mark Twain say something about that, something about having to have a little bit of suffering in heaven, just so the contrast reminds you how good you really have it.�

�I know, I know. And sometimes a good chronic illness is just what the doctor ordered, so to speak. But you don�t want to carry it too far. I don�t get people who try really dangerous diseases. I suppose it�s like those people who get a kick out of eating unusual things. It�s OK up to a point, but then you get those nuts who eat blowfish--what do they call it, fugu or something? If everything goes right, you get a tingling sensation with your meal, but if it doesn�t work out, you stop breathing. Why take that much risk?�

�Well, yes, but isn�t that why we�re here? What was it Nancy tried? Ebola? That�s just going too far. And look where that got her! I suppose that explains the closed casket, too.�