Author

Peter A Schaefer

Cats and Peter Schaefer get along like bankers and cash. Each time (practically) he sits down to write, there's a cat on his chair back. Maybe it just wants food, but that's the cat's way. So read more of Peter's work at catachresis.shoelesspetegames.com, O literati! This fiction is backed by feline guarantee!

http://catachresis.shoelesspetegames.com/

Only One Way

"There's only one way to learn how to swim," Dad said, "and that's to do it." That's when he shoved me into the deep end of the pool. Now that I think of it, I should've been suspicious when he came up behind me. Then I was in the water, splashing and spluttering, and then…

Maybe a Valley

"Podboss Ffdlbpp!" flagellaed Podsboss Pbbdlbsb. "Present!" Flagella gesturing respect and obedience, Podboss Ffdlbpp stood ready. "Boss!" "It is time to take possession. Get all the humans in one place." "Um, in one place, Podsboss?" Ffdlbpp flagellaed. "Yes. A big field, or…

Secretly a Rocketship

"Every tree is secretly a rocketship." The old man's voice was raspy and wobbly, like a drunk wearing corduroy. "They're just waiting for the celeshul alignment to blast off." I don't usually engage with the crazies, but my train was delayed and there was no one else to talk to…

The First Time

He surprised her the first time they had sex. After that, she watched him more closely. Now that she knew what to look for, she could see little irregularities, barely curiosities if she hadn't been suspicious. He brought his food into his mouth with his lips more than his fork,…

Fight of the Century

Felton Bruder paced in his boxing shorts and sweats. His manager looked up from his phone. "Easy, champ. Relax. This is just like any other fight you've been in, alien or not." "You know it ain't." Felton kept pacing. "Every other fight, I've seen the fighter in action. This…

Perfectly Justified Response

"Did you know the Earth formed through planetary accretion during the formation of the Solar System approximately four-point-five billion years ago?" These words greeted Nome as she stepped out into the basement laboratory, pulling her workplace-mandatory goggles on over her…